The 10-Second Rule: Following Jesus Made Simple

By John Pearson —

Guarantee. If you’re bold enough to read this book, you will never forget the simple, but punch-in-the-gut message. And that’s a good thing—because you’ll be on the road to experience more joy in your daily routine than you ever thought possible.

The 10-Second Rule: Following Jesus Made Simple by Clare De Graaf (Paperback edition: April 28, 2015)

The author, who describes himself as a follower of Jesus, businessman, and “a full-time volunteer spiritual mentor of men,” recalled the time his kids wondered why he didn’t help the homeless person asking for money when they were stopped at a traffic light. His response was inadequate—and it made him think: “Why is it that I feel so unprepared for these ‘pop quizzes’ God occasionally sends my way?”

So what’s The 10-Second Rule™?

“Just do the next thing you’re reasonably certain Jesus wants you to do and commit to it immediately—in the next 10 seconds—before you change your mind!”

Here are two options for you:

• Option 1: Read the book and skip the rest of this review. (Best option!)
• Option 2: Read my review first, but warning—no way will my paltry ponderings communicate the simplicity and brilliance of this quick-reading book. Honest. I was tempted to just give you the title and the Amazon link—and then exit this review.

So…here goes, but where to start? Maybe De Graaf’s baseball story in the chapter, “Listening to God.” Are you like me—often waiting for an unmistakable sign from Heaven—before you serve Jesus today? The author imagines this scene: “I’m playing baseball with Jesus.” De Graaf is the pitcher. Jesus is the catcher.

• Jesus signals a fastball. (De Graaf shakes his head—“No, not a fastball.”)
• Jesus signals a slider. (“No, I’m not comfortable with that one either.”)
• Jesus signals a third sign. (“No, not today, thank you!”)

Jesus, disappointed, decides “to let me throw whatever I want to.” You get the metaphor, I know. De Graaf asks, “Has Jesus stopped giving you signals?” He answers his own question: “I doubt it. He never stops speaking to his children. Is there a signal God’s been trying to give you, even as you read this sentence, that you’ve ignored because you just don’t want to obey?” Yikes.

The book was published in 2010 and my friend Dan Busby (1941-2022) sent me this book in 2012. But…yikes! I set it aside on my over-crowded “to be read” bookshelf—and only discovered it last week! Oh, my. On Heaven’s side, I will thank Dan—and apologize for the 13-year delay in reading and reviewing this extraordinary book. (Will there be apologies in Heaven?)

Dan clearly loved the baseball references in The 10-Second Rule. (See Dan’s baseball books.) I’m sure we both would have resonated with Clare De Graaf’s “batting average” of missing the mark on the 10-Second Rule. De Graaf writes:

“You may be asking yourself just how often I obey the Rule myself. I don’t know—40, 50 percent. Maybe. On a good day.” Yet he adds, “This is where grace shines. Nothing about our relationship with God is based on a percentage, or we’d give up altogether.”

I’ve already read half-a-dozen astonishing Rule stories to my wife, Joanne. Simply stunning. You’ll also share these stories with your friends, family, and co-workers. Examples:

• The businessman who thanked an airline employee with a twenty. (Little did he know!)
• The guy who wanted to help a homeless person—yet upon opening his wallet, he had just one dollar in it. Read what the giver learned about himself.
• Amazing stories about Brad, Susan, Veti, and Kyle. Learn why Kyle, a recent high school grad, anonymously gave his school an envelope stuffed with $20 bills ($500 worth!)—with a challenge for 25 students. (But note: the Rule is not always about money.)

Can we really be sure to trust the “impressions” from the Lord to take action within 10 seconds? De Graaf acknowledges, “…when we’re not sure, we tend to play it safe—and do nothing.” But he cheers us on with this: “…I only need to believe it’s the kind of thing Jesus himself might do if he were me. I don’t need to be 100 percent certain. In fact, the need for certainty is often the enemy of obedience.”

In seeking to discern God’s voice (see Chapter 3), the author says that “the impressions you and I receive from God generally fall into three broad categories.”

• Reminders: aka “green lights”—as in “a thou shalt.”
• Warnings: “These impressions are like a warning buzzer about a sin we’ve already committed or we’re contemplating (a thou shalt not).”
• Special Instructions: “…like an instant message, giving us specific guidance as to who we ought to serve, and how, at a given moment.”

De Graaf’s wisdom on warnings for teens is a tad contrarian—but memorable. He recommends that all of us (adults and kids) establish “pre-decisions”—so we’ll be ready to make God-honoring decisions in those 10-second opportunities.

But for teens, he tells about a leader who suggested they skip church one Sunday to “give them some personal time for this one assignment—spend an hour or two along with God, seek his guidance, and then make a mental list, strictly between God and yourself, of the things you’ll never do, or never do again.” That has powerful potential, right?

The chapter, “Love the One You’re With,” spotlights the Good Samaritan and begins with this from Dallas Willard: “In the morning we cannot yet know who our neighbor will be that day.” De Graaf writes, “It’s a story we all know. In fact, one of the problems with this story is that it’s too familiar. Even non-Christians know what the Good Samaritan did…”

So he urges us—as we test the water on the 10-Second Rule—not to choose sides and refrain from doing the moral math on who might be unworthy of our ego-driven benevolence. The Good Samaritan, says De Graaf, “…was compassionate enough to do something incredibly kind, at considerable expense and inconvenience, without knowing whether the victim was a good guy or a jerk.” Oh, my. This is serious stuff—isn’t it?

So…noting that John Ortberg endorsed this book—and appreciating Dallas Willard’s quote—I was reminded that Ortberg asked his publisher to title one of his many books, “Dallas for Dummies.” (They said no!) Hence—I labeled this book review, “The Good Samaritan for Dummies.” (But really…it’s so much more than a 101 course in listening to and acting on God’s voice.)

Example: To prepare for those 10-second rule encounters, De Graaf reads through all four Gospels every year. Why should we go deep and even deeper? “To really follow Jesus, you’ll need to know the whole counsel of God—to know everything that God has tried to communicate to us in the Bible. Your goal is nothing less than building a biblical worldview for yourself—a practical, working theology that informs every moral or spiritual decision you’ll ever make!” (See more on worldviews here.)

De Graaf blends humor with wisdom and poignant stories. I will keep this book close.

• “There’s a joke about a church leader who once cried out in exasperation, ‘Prayer! Has it come to that?’”
• “If you are not faithful in the little things, you will not be entrusted with greater things. Let’s be honest. Okay, I’ll go first. I don’t daydream about being faithful in small things.”
• He references “baby steps” from the Bill Murray movie, What About Bob?
• In the chapter, “The School of Jesus,” De Graaf mentions one of his favorite TV series, The West Wing, and what we can learn from Sam Seaborn (Rob Lowe), President Bartlet’s speech writer. (Here’s another speech writer’s wisdom from 2024.)
• De Graaf’s daughter, Megan, blogged this: “And I hate it when I have to ask my kids to do something a million times before they do it and I’m sorry I do that to God all the time. All the time.”
• “Society refers to nice things people do for others as ‘random acts of kindness.’ However, God is anything but random.” De Graaf reminds: “…no impression that’s truly from God is ever random.”

De Graaf promises that when millions of us get “intentional about imitating Christ, the kingdom family will explode! The 10-Second Rule is more than just a clever memory device to help us tweak our obedience skills some. It’s one of the primary ways God’s will gets done on earth as it is in heaven: by following Jesus’ directions day and night—imitating him.”

Gratefully, De Graaf doesn’t just leave us with a “Just Do It” command (or commercial). His website resources are helpful for leveraging The 10-Second Rule in your church, small group, and in your mentoring.

I’ll wrap this up with De Graaf’s quote from Søren Kierkegaard: “The Bible is very easy to understand. But we Christians are a bunch of scheming swindlers. We pretend to be unable to understand it because we know very well that the minute we understand, we are obliged to act accordingly.”

For more from John Pearson’s Buckets Blog, go here